i suppose it is a kind of fate if you leave a place for a while, den you come back to it and see someone from the place leave the place.

maybe we will wonder with whom we will end up.

you can think of love as a massive game of musical chairs. all the chaos. so much so that you don't know, till the day you die, who was wif u at that last moment.

if love is a game, if you decide to play, then of course you must be prepared to lose.
but win or lose, you won't know till the very end.
and there is always two ways of looking at things. maybe more than two.

and back to that point about how the first sets the "ideal", maybe that's why some people will never forget their first love. and when that happens, they say the first love is the most pure and genuine, subsequent ones are replays. very true, if u go into the next relationship, looking for the shadow of your first love. at least that is how i think it would turn out.

how big is our heart, really? can it hold more than one person? but then again, so what if there is only space for one person? we can always let that person out right? let me let you go. or we can lock that person up and throw away the key. den it's eternal sorrow.

of course i would like to be sentimental, emotional, the heart. it's about the heart. but sometimes, it has to be about the head. that's the cruel fact. we have to force ourselves to detach ourselves and look at things mechanically, cold and calculated. ok, this is what happened. this is what i learnt. that kind of stuff. then our heart will recover, will recuperate, grow stronger.

sometimes, when the going gets tough, when you don't know what the hell is happening, throw everything you know out. because all these preconceptions are clouding your judgement. you keep thinking: this is how things should be. that makes it hard for yourselves. fluidity, flexibility. i cant emphasise enough.

but maybe the most important thing is to never siehst dein leben wie ein film. see ur life as a film. dun make yourself the hero of your own melodrama, thats yijun's words. still very true. cos the world may cry wif u for that 2 hrs, but after that, they go back to their lives, while you are still stuck dere, crying.

you know, there are two ways to protect yourself in football.

1, you don't play. but you hurt yourself, because you are always restraining yourself, stopping yourself from playing, though you want very much to play.

2, play with a nonchalant manner. fall, just pick yourself up. that kind of play. maybe even tripping someone in the process. u just have to endure the pain.

in any case, this season, expect a flurry of transfer activity.

on transfers, i am quite pissed that reyes is talking of leaving. i dun want him to leave, because to me he is a special player. but i tink our team is a little screwed up at the moment. so we have to see how things go. but reyes shouldnt leave. not many players can succeed in epl, because u need a certain kind of temperament. ronaldinho might not be able to survive in epl. but i always believe, even though he hasnt always shown it, that reyes has that kind of temperament. explosive.

like fernando torres. i would like torres to play for arsenal.