my defence

i may have overreacted. i may have a competitive streak that leads me to bending the rules. i think all that was evident today.

my defence( sounds like ashley cole's book) is this: after two barren seasons, two seasons of disappointment, two seasons in which we reached the champions' league final and the league cup final but lost after taking the lead, i only have one thing on my mind- to win.

'so close' is never enough, because it is not 'there.' it is as simple as that. i only want to win. a draw is not good enough because a draw means you are close, but not there yet. i never ever go into something that means something to me, thinking about a defeat, a draw, or anything else. only a win. win, win, win. otherwise, why do you bother to show up?

but of course, deep down, i also know that winning isn't enough. you must win with style. but if you don't win first, nothing else matters. it is a failure. and i am sick of failures.

why i reacted the way i did today was simply because i felt vindicated. vindicated because i believed there isn't any reason why we shouldn't be winning.

and it is always good to beat this kind of people.

and if you ask me, i don't think ashley cole is happy at chelsea.