your answer

i was just thinking about how we can catch manchester united. chelsea, us, liverpool, spurs, and maybe two upsets. 6 games, thats 18 points for them to drop. 18 points for us to close the gap.

and this is your answer.

this is your answer. i still can't quite believe it. but this is your response.

we talk so much about catching up, believing that the race is not over. and we have worked so hard to haul ourselves back to third, and this is our answer.

this is our answer.

i understand. so you don't want to win. here's the plan for the new year:

1) try to score a goal every two games
2) try not to lose two games in a row
3) try not to lose a game by more than two goals
4) try not to concede more than two goals per game

but do you know, that i have never once given up all these months? not even when we lost two in a row. never ever.

what a fool i have been.

we are the joke of the town. the losers. everybody is laughing at us because it's so easy to play us.

and today, you are telling me that straight in the face.

everything that i have held, clung so dearly onto, in this bleak period, all thrown out.

never since that holland game against the czechs have i felt what i felt today. in fact, it is much worse.

because i am absolutely numbed by your answer.

so much for hope. no wonder it is the absence of reason.

i give up, okay?

and i always wonder how parents feel when their kids come up to them straight in the face and tell them they don't share their parents' plans for them. plans that the parents have meticulously worked out.

i think i need a break.

chariot

saw this somewhere and did it for fun. a little freakish, if you ask me. but i like the concept of chariots though. thats why i like to use the egyptians for aom. oh, i miss aom! no thanks to yj, mine is spoilt.

You are The Chariot

Triumph, Victory, Overcoming Obstacles.

The chariot is one of the most complex cards to define. On its most basic level, it implies war, a struggle, and an eventual, hard-won victory. Either over enemies, obstacles, nature, the beasts inside you, or to just get what you want. But there is a great deal more to it. The charioteer wears emblems of the sun, yet the sign behind this card is the moon. The chariot is all about motion, and yet it is often shown as stationary. It is a union of opposites, like the black and white steeds. They pull in different directions, but must be (and can be!) made to go together in one direction. Control is required over opposing emotions, wants, needs, people, circumstances; bring them together and give them a single direction, your direction. Confidence is also needed and, most especially, motivation. The card can, in fact, indicate new motivation or inspiration, which gets a stagnant situation moving again

valencia for life

rafael benitez, hands off david villa. i am seriously warning you. i appreciate what you have done for valencia, but this is seriously too much. you have got sissoko already.

quique flores, don't, don't even think about selling villa.

because villa is not worth 30 million euros. he is priceless. do you realise that he is the most important player for valencia?

and when you have built up an attack that comprises of joaquin and vicente on the flanks, with villa and morientes upfront, you can only throw it all away by removing the most important piece: david villa. the cog in the valencia machinery.

please don't be silly. even 30 million euros is too little. who can you bring in then? many many players. but you are merely reversing our progress by so much. and think about it: who do we need in the team? i think we have a very good squad already. just long-term replacements for ayala and canizares would do. and looking at the money we spent on joaquin, i doubt we are that desperate for money.

so please, please don't be silly.

we have started the season well, then spluttered, partly due to injuries. now, everyone is coming back, so we should get it back on track soon. why throw it all away?

and to david villa, why the hell would you want to go to liverpool? they have gerrard and alonso. we have baraja and albelda. they have crouch. crouch?!?! you have morientes as your strike partner. luis garcia? please. you are so much better.

you want to go there to make a name for yourself, bring them back to their oh-so-glorious glory days?

why don't you stay, and we can beat barcelona and real madrid and return to the glory of merely like 2 or 3 seasons ago.

seriously, i think villa is valencia for life. he just so suits valencia. i don't even think he suits arsenal, much as he is brilliant. some players, i think, can only play for certain teams.

like steven gerrard. however good he is, i can only see him at liverpool. i think if he moves away, moves to a team like chelsea, which doesn't need him as much, he will diminish in stature.

i think he is so good because liverpool needs him so much. it feeds him.

and talking about 30 million euros, maybe gerrard is worth that. the only englishman other than rooney.

certainly not hargreaves. so if i were bayern, i would certainly sell. man utd just so loves to pay too much for too little, it seems.

let me repeat myself: only gerrard and rooney are worth so much, for englishmen. of course i am always welcome to challenges to prove me wrong.

although they certainly arent obliged to do so.

after all, they live in their world of millions and millions, while i live on pittance.

what a romantic way to kill

"but if you don't take out the part that says, 'i don't care if you kill L', i'll die."

the look on L's face is so funny.

waited close to forever for episode 12.

so, van persie got a sweet winner at watford. and gilberto scored again. but what impressed me most about gilberto in that game was that he was everywhere, especially that perfect sliding tackle to make up for djourou's mistake.

anyway i heard a little about al bangura. from what i heard of him, he seems to fit into arsenal. but of course i have not really watched him before. but still, it's a possibility.

anyway, i think baptista has shown a little of the option he can provide. i think wenger has a rough idea on how to use baptista now.

towards the end of the game, you need goals. and you need that something more to get it. desire? magic? brute strength?

i think he already has two. if he can recover his form, then there will be a little bit of magic.

and he can then come in to win the game. he got a very good chance at watford, which showed abit of all three.

although i still ahve complaints about his control.

and sometimes you wonder: if even professionals can control the ball poorly sometimes, what should we expect from us?

maybe it's only you.

orange range's hana live
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4aYCGfsr_uw
i think this live version is really damn nice

michishirube live
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DxSoXj1A0Oo&NR
i dun like this live version much though.

btw theres another song called michishirube by keita tachibana. it's not bad as well. there's a few lines i like.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1gM1XURl2s

そうだろ?　Darlin’
sou daro? Darlin'

too bad i dun seem to be able to find any translation easily. but while watchin the mv on mtv, they gave the translation, albeit in chinese. and it was quite nice.

maybe next time

wondergoals

so, scholes got a cracker against villa.

just one of many such fantastic long range shots nowadays.

and while we go wow, ooh, ahh over these spectacular efforts, you may wonder why arsenal seldom score such goals.

and when you look at the 6 goals we scored against blackburn, i think you know why.

why shoot from so far out when you can shoot from like 10 metres?

misunderstood

i think if you know me, if you understand what i stand for, if you look at what i believe in, you will know what i am tryin to do, what i always set out to do.

i think i often find myself being misunderstood.

and i hate being misunderstood.

but of course, people aren't obliged to understand me.

anyway i think this frequently happens: we form an impression of someone(usually negative), based on perhaps one act. and then subsequent similar acts would be pounced upon by us to reinforce our initial impression, regardless of what other things he does, which usually can prove that the very first act was an anomaly, or simply inconclusive.

we all like to be proven right. and in our haste to do so, we somehow ignore facts, and play up only the supporting evidence.

which isn't all that bad, when you are tryin to sell something, trying to argue for something, trying to seal a deal, etc.

this variant of the self-fulfilling prophecy can be quite negative though. because it leads to misunderstanding. and you aren't really giving that person a fair chance.

but of course, some people really prove themselves to be everything you say they are.

with regards to that, what can i say?

that summer vacation

so i bid farewell to that summer vacation, a term that has come to become synonymous with the heady days of that bygone era, when we ran faster than the wind, and reality, powered by our ideals.

those were the days. but now, it seems, reality has finally caught up with us.

and we find ourselves on the other side.

the other side of what?

anything you can possibly imagine.

here's a song to that summer vacation.

Deeper and Deeper - anna mcmurphy from the ost of long vacation

There were days
When we used to lounge
Hangin' out in my car
Till the sun went down

When I'd call
you'd pick up the phone
Tell me how much
and you were alone

*Let's get deep

**If I ever broke down
gave you what I felt now
Would you still hang around

Are we crazy for feeling this way
You used to laugh until you cried
You and I keeping the world at bay
We'd sit around all day

Let's get deep

Closer and closer
every time we turn around
you'll never be lonely
I'll keep you beside me

Deeper and deeper
I'll never go away

Sun falls torrential
your highness
I'm thinkin' about the days we left behind us
Sunshine and rain and misery
I'll lookin' at you beside me here
now I don't know how
you came into my life wonderin'
will you be my wife
spend a day or two in Spain or France
in the rain we'll dance
Your heart next to mine
beatin'in the rain let me explain
Let me do my thing and tell you how I feel
this love is for real

Summer's finally found us,
the children playing in the sun
baby can't you see our time has come
turning on my radio
I hear the song, and see your face
cause you are the one I can't replace

I would give in
learn to depend
That I'll be there
until the end

Closer and closer
everytime we turn around
you'll never be lonely
I'll keep you beside me
Deeper and deeper
I'll never go away

too bad i can't find any clip of it anywhere. but here's the one that started it all, this incredible journey:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b-a6EOJWoMw
long vacation opening. lalala love song by toshifumi kubota

close to you
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8bTh_I3KZFU

what will i do by natalie burks
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9AOJmV5d08g




what will i do?

always and never

i think as we grow older, our lives become more uncertain.

where in the past 10 means 10, 8 means 8, nowadays, we have to brace ourselves that 10 can easily become 8 or even 6.

which just about proves my point that there is no 100% in this world.
***

and some people in life are not worth fighting for. the more you put in, the more they expect. the moment you step off the pedal, they whine and accuse you of not doing enough.

but behind the scene, you are doing alot for them already, just that they either are blind, don't have the chance to see, or choose to conveniently ignore the fact.

i have decided a while ago that this kind of people...are worth nothing at all.

i have nothing to prove to them, they need to know.

they should also realise that i don't really have to do anything for them.
***

if we always have had something, we won't really use it, because we are scared of losing it.

if we never have had something, the moment we have it, we will use it like there's no tomorrow, because we are scared that it will disappear right in front of our eyes, and we will never have the chance to use it again.

such is the irony of life.

well, you had your fun. and now you are back, things go back to hell again. you want to do as you please, without sparing a thought for us, without giving a damn as to what we think.

isn't that a little like rape?

even if you hadn't had your fun, even if you would also lose those precious few days, it doesn't change the fact that we don't want that. just because you can live without that doesn't mean we can, doesn't mean we want to.

please get that right, thank you very much.

and even if you say, it's just a possibility, everything's gone. because we have to plan everything around your sick little game. now i don't know if it's better for you to carry it out, or to just call it off together. i think either way, it won't matter that much right? cos we are all waiting for it to happen. and because of that, we are cancelling every other thing, that is a zillion times more important than yours. whether or not your game is played. just because there is a possibility you will play with us.

and i hate myself every single moment for losing to you.

do you understand the significance of those few days?

so what if you make it up to us? will you, in the first place? or will it be just on paper? and like i always say, that atmosphere can never be recreated. that day can never come again. only once, mind you. gone means gone.

well, you might say, it's just a date. a number.

then my question back to you:

why pick that date, then?

jibun

if a picture paints a thousand words,

then this is what i am about

rain

i haven't seen rain like this for a while.

well, it always rain alot in december.

but still.

maybe we just haven't had time to pause and watch the rain.

if you ask me, the man utd defeat was in my plans. what i want, hope, will happen.

then maybe they will slip into inconsistency. that's why i am always more worried about chelsea. because my stand remains the same: i dun tink man utd will win. they are jsut a distraction. what about larsson, you might ask. ja, maybe his arrival will rejuvenate them a little for a photo finish to the end. or maybe he will be a flop.

but to me, man u's job is to keep the pressure on chelsea while we get our act together. we kept our part of the deal by making chelsea drop points. as if on cue, west ham kept their part of the deal to make man utd drop points. and suddenly things look ominous. it's like this is the signal for us to start.

i was waiting for this whole thing to happen. of course i was expecting a win against portsmouth. but sometimes, we have to make do.

so, do we have the guts to do it?

man utd did haul back from 12 points down before, to pip none other than yours truly for the title.

so what's impossible?

play all the youngsters today, against liverpool. even if we lose, it's ok. just play all of them. then we can see where we are headed. we need to see where we are headed.

i told you so.

haha, finally west ham didnt let me down. 1-0 to them, thanks to nigel reo-coker.

finally. they should have pulled it off in the fa cup final last season.

so this season, the record stands at 2-1. spurs beat chelsea, and west ham beat man utd, but sheffield lost to man utd.

i like this kind of david versus goliath games. though spurs arent exactly davids, but for that game, the odds were very good.

anyway, i like to bet against man utd, i realise. last year when lille beat man utd, i was about to bet on lille, but changed my mind and went for draw.

they are going head to head again.

18 december 1987

you might not believe it, but ayaka and miki ando were born on the exact same date.

18 december 1987.

which was like yesterday 19 years ago.

no wonder they were saying something about the significance of miki ando performing to ayaka's song in all those interviews/talks. i finally figured out what the real fuss was about.

it was not jsut about the song i believe. also about their birthday.

even though it was just a random link, sometimes, we must admit we are all folly to that, people just like to pounce on such randomness.

and make it the story of a lifetime.

anyway, this is mihimaru gt's so merry christmas-take 6-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cmw_Fa7nICc

i think it's quite a nice song. i like their rap. think miyake's voice complements hiroko's nicely.

你离去 那天忽然倾盆大雨

violin

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ux3tboe_n4Y

there was one part when she pulled off a harder part, and there was this smile.

it is that kind of smile, that you know you created something special.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cbAigOxY_0I
lee hom's liu lei shou xin
i think it's the violin. i would like to think that it is the violin, even if it isnt.

anyway, i think the violin is like autumn.

classy with a tinge of melancholy.

it was certainly an intriguing contest between internacional and barcelona in the world club cup championships final. no doubt barca had the possession and the chances, but when your stars don't show up to play, you can't really blame anyone else but yourself.

when you need them most, they let you down.

adriano certainly didnt, when he came on as a sub. one chance was all it took for internacional to score. Iarly tormented puyol throughout, and when he shrugged off puyol yet again, he laid a beautiful pass into the path of adriano. one touch to take it past his marker, then a flick past the keeper. 1-0.

intriguing contest. internacional's tactics shut out barcelona's attacking flair. individually, they came out tops against their own direct opponent, especially the right back. he kept ronaldinho relatively quiet. it has been a very tactical match.

you can say the defence beat the attack today.

but seriously, internacional had some good moves as well. they weren't really negative. they didnt set out to defend. it was more the case of barcelona pegging them back. and i think they realised their best chance was to hit on the counter. anyway, i think it is more the case of barcelona losing to themselves, as with all great attacking teams.

this is what happens when you don't kill them off.

anyway watch out for alexandre pato. he's only 17. but i think he has something special. of course he has to learn to look up and pass more as well. he reminds me of cristiano ronaldo, actually, the flair. but he's actually a striker. anyway what caught my eye was the video of him in action they played before the game. he juggled the ball with his shoulder during the game,think against al-ahly, after he got away from his marker.

and ronaldinho freekicks are quasi-penalties.

the last two games showed clearly that we have character. a late winner against wigan, then coming back from two goals down to draw 2-2 with portsmouth.

but you realise it could ahve been 3-2, 4-2, 5-2 to us?

i rather we not show any character: win the game from the start. dominate and win from start to finish.

we are still left with many unanswered questions. lehmann, especially. can we please get a younger, less eccentric keeper? for someone of his experience, i think it's fair to say, he has let us down many, many times. he costs us the small games, and saved our big games.

sometimes, it's the small games that matter.

and adebayor is doing well. surprisingly. aliadere as well, actually, though he got subbed off.

actually, we could have completed the comeback. we should have.

we always screw ourselves up.

crisis after crisis.

when can the real thing start?
***
cool things this season:

samsung yp-k5 mp3 player
wallpaper city guides
nokia ads
samsung ads
sony ericsson ads

miki ando and ayaka

about byousoku 5 cm
http://randomc.animeblogger.net/2006/11/24/random-musings-five-centimeters-per-second-edition/

miki ando's skate america routine, performed to the english version of ayaka's i believe.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sxwPzqy8FTA

i think it's a very apt choice. we all know what happened in turin, the winter olympics, when miki ando fell during a jump and was thus placed 15th.

and i believe's jap lyrics are already quite nice, quite inspiring
http://cherryblossom-garden.com/1/ayaka-eng1.html

in the video, you will see abit of the english lyrics.

but i think basically the song fits miki ando very well, because it's about coming back. coming back from defeat. back from the brink. and that's what she has done.

she's gone on to win skate america '06.

i think miki ando+ayaka is a very powerful combination. grace+power

now, i just need to find the english lyrics of i believe.

even if

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ESCf1BaW7yc
hirai ken's life is~another story~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UafhX68JyqM
ken hirai's even if

I said I just found this place by chance, but
The truth is, I've been wanting to bring you here for a long time

The candlelight wavers gently and at the counter
You gaze happily at the ring he gave you
Drops of me don't fall on your heart, but
Until this bourbon and cassis soda is gone
You, you are mine

Lock the door, stop time
So that you can't leave here
I wonder if I'm starting to get a litte drunk
This is really how I feel, though
You should get a little drunk, too
And you should lean against my shoulder
But once again I swallowed all the words And looked away from you

Whenever the conversation cuts off and our time wanders
You always just talk about him over and over

Even though I thought I wanted to know anything about you
I lit a cigarette just to interrupt the words

Your glass is filled by someone else
When you've finished this bourbon and cassis soda
Will you, will you return to his breast?

Lock the door, wait for the last train
So that you can't go home
Now I'm just being conceited, but
This is really how I feel
You should just get drunk, too
And you should forget about him
But you swallowed the last of the bourbon
And looked at your watch

Well, I'm quite drunk now, but
It's all your fault
Lock the door, wait for the last train
Stop time

*there was another translation i found on corichan. there were two main disprecancies, which btw, if you translate word for word, as i have done, will find that this version which i posted up, thanks to megchan, is the more accurate one.

the first point of contention:
I just happened to notice you," I said a while back,
but the truth is, I wanted to come & take you from a long time ago.

the second:
The conversation pauses; everytime the time wanders when we're together,
you always just repeat everything he says

my point is that if corichans' translation stood, it would have been nice as well.

especially the part about repeating everything he says.

kare/ kanojo. he(boyfriend)/ her(girlfriend)
have you ever realised the immense potential of these two simple words to wreak emotional pain?

swift

wah lau. i feel quite cheated. the total 90 nike swift ball, the red and white one, is priced at only $26.25. and i have been eyeing it. but as fate would have it, i bought the champs league ball instead, cos i saw and verified the price of the swift to be 62 bucks. maybe that was a real one, but when you realise it is actually available at a reasonable price, within the budget, then you definitely feel a pang of regret.

red and white would be nice.

always on the backfoot

maybe you would heave a sigh of relief at having finally solved the problem, even giving yourself a pat on the back.

but you never realise that you were always on the backfoot.

never in control.

so my question remains the same.

they pay you so much for what?

my sweet darling

i have never enjoyed myself as much as i had today for a while. i thought i had fun.

it just so mirrors arsenal's fortunes eh?

but i guess for me today, the happiest thing was for kenneth to play again.

and still looking sharp as well.
***
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cUz1OHOc7EA
ayaka's i believe sounds nicer and nicer and nicer.

my fave part of the song is this line: sonna jibun ni "sayonara"
that sayonara part is very nice. very stylish.

and the meaning is: i say goodbye to that uncertain me.

and another nice old song. it was for some cm. hitomi yaida's my sweet darling
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h4t1E3qiIAM

anyway, they are talking about making a prequel to the death note series, something to focus on L.

L!L!L!L!

humans are so interesting.

when you think of life as if you are walking a tightrope, as long as you are walking, no matter how slowly, you can see ahead and keep a pace, and view the distant horizon. but as soon as you stop and look down, you see the bottom and get frightened, when that happens, you end up having to look at your own life...

many people don't even have a chance to stop and look at their lives with some perspective.

your archaic ideals belong to the sepulchre.

"crisis, what crisis?" was the question the commentator asked after gilberto put away that penalty to give us a 2-0 lead.

my question would be: "who says we can't play physical?"

in fact, i would be very happy if we get called for fouls. because it shows that we are on our way to learning how to play the physical game. and the nicest part, albeit frustrating, was adebayor's run past ledley king, which was eventually stopped because the ref deemed he had fouled king on his way through. nice, because king is big-sized(no doubt adebayor is tall) and we can bring him to the ground. frustrating because i dun think it was a foul, and he would have been 1 on 1.

the nature of the physical game is such that you can never be 100% clean, because not every challenge and tackle can be perfect. and sometimes, good challenges can be deemed to be fouls by the ref. so there is no 100% clean.

learning the physical approach would be taking a step towards the great ajax team of the 1970s, which ruud krol had described as "we can play any style, beautiful or physical"

anyway, i think we dominated the first half, although the possession stats at halftime showed spurs with 51 percent, us with 49 percent. and the commentators certainly felt that arsenal played better and dominated. but whether we outplayed them is a big question mark, because they never got around to playing their game, so how can we compare?

what does outplay really mean? i always associate it with dominate. but just now, while watching, it suddenly occured to me that maybe outplay encompasses another meaning. or maybe dominate encompasses another bit.

but the second half, we played badly, safe for the defending. in fact, i think overall we did well defensively. but in the second half it was more even, and the last 15 min, maybe we were too relaxed. but the introduction of hleb certainly brought some fluency into our game. it was more fluid, although we clearly had less of the ball.

but did we play stylish football? not really. did we play physical? quite. did we play with heart? definitely. i love the way we keep winning the ball back, the way we keep robbing them, catching them in possession. and yes, i tink clichy did very well defensively, but there were a few stray passes and djourou as well. but eboue, learn to shut up. play. dun whine. dun react negatively. react by beating them. react by sending in good crosses. react by scoring. do anything but something stupid. and ljungberg, i just feel that his time is up. which, as i reiterate, is a pity. fabregas wasnt really inspired, van persie wasnt really in the game, gilberto recovered from a poor start, thank god. i think there were alot of negatives from the game on our part.

but overall, we deserved the win. especially when spurs werent really playing most of the time. look at the number of times they got robbed. think you would cringe. so we win because we played, and they didnt. good enough, i suppose.

the offside question, van persie's handball. controversial decisions abound, but i think rather than blame these decisions, spurs fans should take a look at their own mistakes. the atrocious defending. how they always got caught in possession, how theygive the ball away carelessly, how they cocked up their own offside trap in adebayor's goal. go and count the times they got caught in possession. and what about the way van persie surged beyond king and jenas? you know what happened? van persie started running in the middle of his own half, after he was knocked off balance by some spurs guy tracking back. and if you still let him get in front of you, something is very wrong. those were the real reasons why they lost, not the refereeing decisions.

3-0 the final score.

tottenham hotspurs. Try Harder, next time.

two questions:

is it better to have something that can, at any moment disappear into thin air, or never to have it at all?

is it better to play well and lose, or to play badly and lose?

battle of wits

"expressing in one word, the thought of a human being standing alone in tokyo's winter" - takuro of glay.

the essence of hitoiro.

i like the starting part more and more. should have guessed glay had a part in it. the way so many words are crammed in such that it becomes sort of a tonge twister has been evident in a few glay songs such as all standard is you and way of difference.

and that part is very nice.

along with the "oyasumi". i think it's very stylishly done.

anyway hitoiro means a colour.

watched andy lau's battle of wits. quite cool! i think the mozi are very cool pple. anyway when andy lau made his appearance, it was damn cool as well. when he flipped the hood back. i think he looks like a warrior monk. i think i might be interested in taking a look at the manga.

i think the slave whom ge li set free is quite a character as well. also quite stylish. as well as fan bing bing. i think her eyes are damn dazzling. the kind of eyes that talk.

but i have a question: why must there always be a love element in every show?

anyway, some nice quotes which i still remember:

"you were the best archer, the best warrior, the best rider only because you are the prince. expand your horizon and you can see more" (cant remember the exact words, but this is roughly the essence of ge li's words to the prince)

"you mozi talk of loving everyone. maybe it's because you don't know who to love" the slave to ge li. again, cant remember exact words, but this is roughly the essence.

but ultimately, it's the pacifist message the movie is trying to spread.