Thursday, August 31, 2006

so, i guess you aren't leaving after all, ashley cole. at least not for the next four months.

do you still want to play?

if you will just say sorry, maybe i might just forgive you.

but you, you the one who said "years of loyalty thrown back in the face",

are still a mercenary. pure and simple.

it will take alot to win any little respect back from anybody, from any arsenal fan.

i doubt you will, anyway.

you either play or you get out.

too bad chelsea doesnt think they need you enough.

and i think that makes you look pathetic.

maybe we lose out with this outcome, but it doesnt matter.

not when you look pathetic.

sneijder

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ldfcjoeUrw

sneijder's first goal against nac. we won 2-1. quite a nice goal, the finish, a lobbing kind of shot.

the sad thing is that he's pulling out of the dutch squad for the qualifiers for personal reasons. he din play agains the irish cos his wife was giving birth. apparently she still hasnt. that must be why.

which is a pity because sneijder is always a good player to have on your team. esp since vdv is out again with injury. again. haiz. not again.

anyway sorin's going hamburg. i am not sure how useful he would be. even if he might be the captain of argentina. so what?

Sunday, August 27, 2006

german

listening to the cd stefan burnt for me the other time round. with all the nice songs from silbermond, juli, soehne mannheims.

the cd is very important to me, not just because it's a gift, but also because it introduced me to all these nice german songs. and german bands. of course i already knew soehne mannheims prior to gettin the cd, but wifout it, i might enver have fallen in love with silbermond's symphonie.

there's another reason why the cd is very important. my weakest point for german has always been listening. the songs in there, together with the 96.3 deutsche welle were my companions in that last stretch before the a's. maybe the songs more.

it is kind of funny, how i like to push everything back, till i have my back faced to the wall, and then produce the goods. like that last-ditch tackle.

i miss germany...and japan.

the trains, the bridges, the streets...many many nice things.

on gifts. i read some old sms fr shux, stored in an old phone which i used after my phone got stolen in the december of 2004. somehow, those messages were still in there. never got ard to deleting them.

and everything came back. we were at bobby's hse watching soccer.

but before that, my stuff got stolen, along with dom's. two out of so many. never say never.

anyway, i lost more than the 70 bucks i had in my wallet. i lost a discman as well. and the discman was a gift from my brother.

i can never quite forgive the bloody thief who took the things. not yet.

some things are more important because of the sentimental value. more than the money.

good luck!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HLppohgCgUg

clip of good luck! the music is yamashita tatsuro's ride on time, which was actually like from the 1980s. i like the song because it's so laxing. the feeling is like lyign down on a big wide field, and watching a plane fly over u.

i liked good luck! because of a few reasons

kou shibasaki was very stylish.
i like the story.
i like the song.
kuroki hitomi is also very stylish. you would never guess she's like above 40.

i tink it was shown in 2005.

i watched quite a few nice dramas in 2005.

good luck
pride
last christmas
orange days
ace o nerae
densha otoko

6 is quite alot.

hetakuso!

that's shibasaki's line in good luck

sakura iro mau koro with scenes from nana
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pzEB54OBMwQ
sakura iro mau koro original pv
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OxSSAW3Yvtk
oborozukiyo~inori pv
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6yV-7JSTpMY

inverted logic

sometimes you have to think in another direction.

like u r moving with the ball to this side, then you move to the other side.

you can open up the play.

you can do many more things,

previously bounded by convention.

sometimes the truth isn't on this side, but on the other.

if there is any truth at all.
才知道你脸上的微笑
不是幸福代表
是种不自在的礼貌

not barcelona

barcelona are a funny team. they arent as world class on paper as they seem. especially in defence. my first impression when i tink of barcelona is an invincible team. haven't they strolled tru to win la liga last season? and the champs league as well? with quite stylish football too.

but when you tink abt it, they shuldnt be that intimidating.

in fact, no team is. not even the old real madrid. and it is always the defence that is the problem.

in any case, real madrid has indeed considerably strengthened their defence this season.

phil ball says only valencia and real madrid can catch barcelona.

the european super cup saw sevilla beat barca 3-0. that with ronaldinho's lacklustre performance in the world cup, i have this feeling that barca wun run away with it this season. even with the signing of zambrotta and thuram. maybe ronaldinho will continue to suffer the blues of the world cup.

maybe maybe.

zaragoza should be interesting to watch. how to fit d'alessandro and aimar together.

back in england, spurs lost again. quite stunning.

but despite being an arsenal fan, i am not quite caught up in the spurs-arsenal rivalry. perhaps it's because the real competitors are still liverpool, chelsea and man utd. no doubt spurs are on the ascendancy, no doubt they pushed us all the way last season, but i dun derive as much pleasure from their defeat than say chelsea's for example. the feeling is more of...being amused. after all, they did spend alot, so i was kind of expecting a really really strong team. not a team which loses 2 out of 3 games.

but we arent doing any better ourselves.

that's the cruel fact.
i suppose you could say all the speculations are really disrupting the mood in the team. but still, that is no excuse. i think we have to start playing football. if you want to win the title, it all starts right here. right now.

you have to focus. and please don't start all that talk of a crisis. if you are staying, you are staying. don't you dare think of questioning things, don't you dare think of leaving after just two games.

on a slightly brighter note, valencia beat betis 2-1. aimar and mista's departures haven quite sunk in yet. aimar might have been a luxury to have at mestalla, but you can't deny that he was really like dynamite for us. short-lived explosive power. and mista, he was really a one-season wonder. even in that season, you already would feel that he might not be able to reproduce that form. still, there is some feelings for him. but i tink joaquin sanchez is coming to valencia.
on the left, vicente, on the right, joaquin. spain's first choice wingers(if i were to pick)

WOW.

anyway, mark gonzalez is quite shuai. tts the only thing i have to say abt the pool-hammers game. west ham were quite crap. they din give benayoun the ball more. they needed him to create the chances. anyway, kuyt did make his debut. he was quite lively. came close to scoring a couple of times. certainly above average, but still never going to be world class.

of cos he was out to impress. he was next in line after van the man. now van the man is dropped, and he din step up as expected, because there's huntelaar now. in a way, he has to start from zero all over again. he can't return to the wings for holland either, because you look at the way robben and van persie play... holland's attack is going to be like this for now.

i am kind of sorry for kuyt. but it seems that he is just not destined to play first team for holland. not unlike roy makaay. not bad, quite good, but someone else's better. bergkamp+kluivert, then van niistelrooy. makaay never had the chance. like kuyt now. his destiny was to facilitate the transition of the old guards to the next generation.

Sara

Sara

Sara, Sara,
This name I dreamt,
That winter in Spain.
Like an unwritten song,
I know not,
How you look, how you sound.
How I long to know,
So, to ease my pain.

Sara, Sara,
This name I sought,
That spring in Spain.
Roamed the land,
In search of a face,
One I have never seen.
Obsessed,
Never more have I been.

Sara, Sara,
This name I felt,
That summer night in Spain.
Calling out to me,
I feel it in the wind.
Could she be,
Across the street,
Or across the strait?

Sara, Sara,
Her face I saw,
That autumn in Spain,
In the desert across,
A blooming rose,
A million faces into one,
A Creation
Of my solitude.

Saturday, August 26, 2006

responsibility

if you aren't prepared to take responsibility, please don't put yourself in that kind of situation in which you have to. it is not about being responsible or not. i don't like to take responsibility for stupid things. that's why i make sure i don't put myself in those silly positions where my conscience will appeal to me to do something about it.

and when you end up in that kind of situation, please have abit of conscience.

don't you sink the whole ship.

integrity is not about sinking the whole ship.

who can live, should live.

i hate people who just stand there and do nothing about something when they should, because they were the ones who gave the ball away.

surely you don't expect me to do everything for you?

tell the stories of those who lived, so that the living will live on for those who died.
[totally unrelated to the above, actually]

Friday, August 25, 2006

your imperfect perfect world/ your perfect imperfect world

i think this was the central theme of murakami's hardboiled wonderland and the end of the world. it really is a very intriguing book. very imaginative. it's like someone living two parallel lives, one a sci-fi, one a fantasy.

it's really scary that we try so hard to create an imaginary world, our perfect world, that in reality, is actually so horribly wrong. and the worst thing is that we dunno we are creating this world???

but i really must admit that this is really a genius of a book. it really took a lot of imagination.

now, i want very much to read kafka on the shore.

they say murakami is kafka's successor. i have read some of kafka's writings in german, but i still can't really establish what kind of writer kafka was, but i can sort of tell u what murakami is like. and the thing is, my vague impression of kafka isnt liddat.

i feel an urge to find out more about kafka.
****

hey, the johan cryuff shield means nothing if we are out of the champions' league. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING AT ALL. i can't believe we are out just liddat. we shouldnt be. what the hell went wrong? we even won away.

maybe without the champions' league, we can focus more on winning back the domestic title.

but really, without the champions' league, i think alot is meaningless.

not even a 3-1 win over PSV in the johann cryuff shield match.

not even a 5-0 win over waalwijk on opening day.

***

there are many things in life that we wish would end quickly, only to be filled with regrets on hindsight.

i have experienced this kind of situation four times.

np, cat high, soccer, nj.

i promise myself that this won't be the fifth time.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

sara

the sara in my nic for this weekend isnt actually a girl's name, let alone refer to any girl with whom i might be involved in a scandal, as some friends have suspected.

it is actually a nakashima mika song which i have never heard before(it wasnt in Best either)

it is actually the short form of sabaku no bara. desert rose. i thought it was a very cool name for a song. it's like code. you think it's a name, but really, it stands for something else all together. at the same time, it provides alot of room for hidden meaning.

like say you write this thing you title as sara. you can say it stands for desert rose. but maybe it is written for sara, the girl too. likening her to a desert rose, perhaps? that kind of thing. a wide range of possibilities.

potential.

all in a name.

what's in a name? that which we call a rose by any other word would smell as sweet- romeo and juliet

nakashima mika

to me, in the world of jpop, the three female singers with the nicest voices are nakashima mika, onitsuka chihiro and yuna ito.

nakashima mika's helpless rain, find the way, oborodukiyo~inori and sakurairo maukoro are very nice. i still think her ballads are nicer than her faster songs. except glam sky of cos.

but you should watch the mv of sakurairo maukoro, go youtube to find, it's there, i am lazy to put it here. the story is very cliched, but the presentation is very nice. you will know when you see it.

and talking about cliches, i suppose cliches are part and parcel of this world, because like i said before, maybe the world is just all these lines. pple follow the same path, we are just at different points in time, so all these stories, we are hearing them from time immemorial, and we say they are cliches. but really, they are just part of us. they are in us, you might say.

and why the sudden surge in nakashima mika songs? i bought her Best dvd. tts y.
those eyes that talk.

at that moment, those eyes seemed to have smiled.

but i won't be there next week.

is it my imagination, or i am seeing more and more pairs of eyes that talk?
opening day blues, i suppose. pool were widely tipped to win, but had to count on a controversial penalty to hold sheffield to a draw.

and we had to wait till the 83rd minute to get the equaliser. it would have been very embarrassing to lose your first competitive game at emirates. anyway, i was quite stunned when the news reported the latest score of the game. i was stunned to see us down 1 goal. den i switched on gamecast to follow the game. we had 60 percent possession, i think 18 corners, and 7 shots on target. den it became 10 shots on target. when walcott came in, i was thinking, maybe he would do something. he crossed and gilberto scored. den i was even thinking we could win.

but as it turned out, we didnt.

sometimes, faith can only take u so far.

Saturday, August 19, 2006

-i didnt score today, because there was no service.

*it's the system's fault then. lone strikers can be left isolated.

-no, it's not the system. it's me. when there was no service, i didn't have the guts to do it alone, to go alone.

***

there was a holland tshirt which i was interested in. but they were askign for 20, at most reduced to 18. the thing is tt it's not the one i am looking for. the colour, the design, there's something missing. all or nothing.

why is it so hard to find something that's just right?

but if i find it, i would be willing to pay any price.

that's if i can find it.
4 wasted chances in 2 days. less than 24 hours, technically.
*hey, you know, you have wasted six hours of your time today.
-i know.
*and you were looking forward to this weekend. and you had promised to make the most out of it.
-i know, but there's seriously nothing to do, and nothing i can do about it.
*so how are you going to make use of the rest of the time?
-i don't know.
*there's one more thing to look forward to, right?
-ja.
*but you do know that when the time comes, you would ahve only 11 and a half hours left, and after it, maybe only 6 and a half.
-it certainly sounds scary.
*so how? are u really going to wait till then to start feeling as though u have made use of your time? it would be too late right? and when you realise that, you wouldnt have the mood anymore.
-maybe tonight...
*tonight? face it...
-ja i know, nothing might materialise.
*and time is ticking by. 29 and a half hours left.
-shit.
*you have lost to time.
-have i really? or is it something else?
*what?
-you know it.

Friday, August 18, 2006

ireland

isn't it a little scary if you see yourself in other people? it's like the world is just a gigantic maze filled with mirrors everywhere, at every corner. and it's so quaint to hear others' stories which so resemble your own. it's like the world is also made up of parallel lines; people are in the same direction. or maybe there are many lines, and people just start at different points on these lines. either way, pythagoras would have been right: the world is really made up of numbers.

it would be my nightmare though.

more on numbers.

it's holland 4, ireland 0, in ireland. ireland's heaviest home defeat since the one against spain all the way back in 1931. and guess what, huntelaar scored twice, and created two. actually, i think he scored thrice. that first one should have been a goal, the keeper parried it to him, so it shouldnt be offside. a hattrick on his debut. wow. now you know why ruud is out. and why they so wanted him to be in the world cup team. 33 goals in 34 games is not simple you know. his second goal, should have been his third, was very classy, a chip over the keeper. and his first, should have been his second, was very predator-like, free header. classy and lethal. perfect combi for any striker. and what about that backheel for robben to slot in?

speaking of style, van persie's goal was superb. slammed all the way to the roof. is he really going to be the new bergkamp, albeit one on the flank?

granted that it's a depleted ireland, it's still very important to win. because if you want to win 2008, it all starts right here.

and so, ireland really has quite a bit of problems going into the qualifiers, because they are going to play germany, which has beaten sweden 3-0. two goals from klose. his first was nice, jinking past the defence, and then somehow curling the ball low in. then his second was like out of nothing. schweinsteiger just volleyed the ball in, and he pop out of nowhere to power a header in.
and borowski played a perfect cutback that somehow missed the entire defence to fall to schneider to slam home. who needs ballack when you have borowski?

on epl transfers. ashley cole is not out yet. and abedayor says he hopes that reyes will leave so that he wun disrupt the team. i rather abedayor leave.

kuyt has moved to liverpool. much as i respect benitez and like him, i think he has gotten the wrong man. he always goes wrong when it comes to holland. just look at jan kromkamp. kuyt is good, but i dun think he is that good. as in he isnt in the top tier. so liverpool shouldnt have wasted their time signing him, because i dun really believe that he will make alot of impact. but that's their problem. oh, and i oso dun think that he is that kind of special player that van persie is. there's just something missing in kuyt's play.

on players making impact, i dun believe shevchenko and ballack will make alot of impact either.

Sunday, August 13, 2006

dear god, you have your unique way of telling me things, of humbling me, of making me realise.

and i must admit that even after so many years, after so many times, you did it again, without me ever having any chance of foreseeing it.

reeling from it, humbled by it.







but still very much helpless about it.
it's me, with a camera, with a mp3, with a ball and a book to wander around the world.

in search of my destiny.

in search of my kanna.

ai katou




i can't find any screencaps of the movie. which is like damn sad.

look up at the sky

i know people do die. but miracles do happen. maybe we won't believe in them; maybe we are too cynical, but still, i guess sometimes we have to make that choice.

tell the stories of those who lived,

so that the living will live on.

yet never forgetting those who died.

sometimes, things get quite ironic. like paying more for a movie you enjoyed less than another. but i guess that was wad happened with umizaru. or rather, the reverse. somehow it was only 8.50, as compared to 9.50 for tokyo drift.

umizaru 2: limit of love was quite nice. 7/10. but ai katou made it 8/10, or maybe even more. and i like the ending part. when precious just came on. i don't know, but my general impression is that people tend to get up from their seats the moment the credits start coming on. there were too few pple in the cinema to test my hunch. but if i werent lookin forward to the song, if i hadnt known anything about the song, maybe i would have gotten up when the credits came on, as i would for most otehr films. but i think i would have been jsut stopped in my track immediately. yuna ito's voice like just made time stood still. i think people would have stopped to listen to it till the end. i did, but that was because i was expecting it all this while.

and the clip they showed wif it, of the scenes from umizaru2 and umizaru1 and all the cast playing around was very nice.

the answer is in the system

ignoring the playmaker, the attacking mid, i think basically there are two kinds of attack. one is a one-man attack, look at 4-3-3, 3-4-3, 4-5-1, and then there is the strike partnership 4-4-2, 4-2-4. you either play with one in the centre or two in the centre.

my preferred system is always the lone man in the centre.

people always tell me they dun believe i "have no club", or that i "have never had a club". i dunno why they believe this way. but i have never been able to give a satisfactory answer to them. but maybe now i can.

you see, my preferred formations are 4-3-3 and 3-4-3. and these formations are about the lone striker, never mind tt there are two support wingers. but the striker is alone. the mentality to play in it, the mentality required to believe in it is different.

of course i always stress the importance of understanding within a team, but i think the difference with the strike partnership is that alot is actually dependent on the understanding between the two strikers. it is perhaps more important than the understanding between the other members of the team. with a lone striker, anyone can link up with him to score, but when you field two strikers, how they work together will be the crucial factor.

maybe it's because i have yet to come across such a fearsome strike partnership that i just don't believe it can be better than a lone striker, like how sometimes we need to be shown it in order to be able to believe in it. maybe it's because i believe in maximising your potential sources of goals, read: flexibility, any style, anyhow. and even if there is some form of understanding, for example wif hq, i still believe it's more like the attacking mid with the striker, not two strikers.

so maybe that's why i find it hard to relate to an understanding between two people side by side, close together, because the systems which i favour are not like this.

the mentality is jsut different, i guess. or maybe to be more precise, it's the degree of necessity. i believe one can do the job; you dont really have to need two. i think i need to be shown that you need two. or maybe because i am still looking for that strike partner to convince me that two is better than one. but seriously, i think even if that's the case, i will still believe in 4-3-3 or 3-4-3 on the real pitch/court.

it's abstract, but i think it reflects the mentality. the kind of you-can-go-alone attitude.

i have yet to be humbled by my solitude. ironically, maybe it is because of the ball.

so now you have got your answer.

Saturday, August 12, 2006

maybe i should ahve went for the shot today, however tight the angle was.

i think i din go for the shot because i was thinking, this was their show, not mine. so i went for the pass.

or maybe because i wasnt confident enough. because i didnt suspend myself in that dream-like state. sometimes, you have to do that in order to do things that you thought were impossible. the otehr way, of course is to just close your eyes and take that leap of faith. maybe.

but even now, that moment still haunts me. because it represented one chance for me to bury the ghost of the past.

if i could be in that position all over again, if i could shoot again, it would be a goal.

it had to be that red.

we are on track for the champions' league.

at least ajax and arsenal. valencia lost away, hamburg drew at home.

but in zagreb, hleb+fabregas+van persie was very lethal. hleb got a part in all 3 goals. the first goal, he crossed, but it was all about van persie's control and layoff for fabregas to run in and strike home. very nice goal. watching the video, i thought at first that it was abedayor, cos i thought van persie got the goal. but if you think logically, it's highly unlikely. as it turned out, it was van persie and fabregas. second goal, hleb played a beautiful ball through to van persie who swept it to the far corner. a little lucky, cos the keeper, i think he could ahve touched it. but the fact was that he didnt, and arsenal were 2-0. 3rd goal, again hleb wif the pass to fabregas, who shrugged off a challenge, den went to the right, den swept it across for number 3.

they say hleb was fantastic against alkmaar. i tink he's settling down in england. dont forget, last season was his first in epl. so this season should be it.

wad if cole leaves and clichy is still out? i won't know. but just get him out of ashburton asap k. cant stand the sight of him. we will figure something out. but jsut sell him and get the money first. get gallas. whoever. gallas would be a nice addition, though he doesnt want to play left back, and if i were arsene, he would be playing dere. but at least get him in first?

den there's the qn of ribery. i think i would prefer reyes over ribery. but i tink if reyes leave, ribery would be coming to arsenal. though i would very much prefer us to sign fernando torres, because he is taht player who will complete the attack. we have plenty of support strikers already, even henry can be considered one, but just look at reyes, if he's still ard, van persie, hleb, rosicky. tts 4. we need an out and out striker, a poacher, someone who can allow us to switch to plan b, if the fluid passing doesnt work out. moreover, torres got that bit of technique too. so he would fit right in.

but let's just get ashley cole out first k.

i think it's the red. the maroon last season was quite inauspicious, i think. even if it may be the original. but this blood red is much better. arsene wenger's arsenal is just not the same arsenal as herbert chapman's, or george graham's.

and ajax uses that red too.

found out something interesting today: dw says that i like the same teams as jasin. ajax, valencia and holland. 3/4, only no arsenal. but it's nice to know someone who likes ajax.

and when i look at henk ten cate, i just know i can trust him.

lead us to the promised land, henk.

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

bokura no te, amaenbo, planetarium, furenzu, himawari, glamorous sky, cassis, hana, michishirube, precious, endless story, ocean, story, boku no kimochi, symphonie, missing you, goodbye.

watched tokyo drift. i tink its ok, though edwin says it sucks. recognised a few familiar faces in it. like the guy who gave the go at teh start, think it was tsumabuki satoshi of orange days. though he look more punkish. as kai in orange days, he was teh goody two shoes. and sean boswell was definitely the mike winchell in friday night lights.

look thierry, it's not about whether or not we want ashley cole. he wants out. so too bad. we can't force him to stay.

some people say, that cole was right in wanting to leave, after all arsenal din support him at all. years of loyalty thrown in the face, when he was punished for the tapping up incident, without any form of support from arsenal.

hey, u r talkin abt a team that groomed u, that gave u what u have. of cos u had talent, but wifout arsenal, u wun be here. and u r talking to me abt years of loyalty? it probably ended when tt call from chelsea came. and u actually dare to invoke that word "loyalty".

hey, ashley, u don't know what loyalty means.

i don't believe arsenal mean more to you than money.

when you look at players like maldini, mauro silva, i think you should look back on this and be ashamed of yourself that you actually dare suggest you have loyalty. maybe you had. but i am sure when you got the fame, the recognition and the money, you forgot how to spell it and what it means.

money ruins football. thanks roman abramovic.

and thanks cole, you can leave. you should leave. the best player without his heart here is a dead player. hey, you need your heart to live, right?

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

chelsea with an A

i can't believe i actually believed you.

now i know, what a fool i have been.

i have never trusted you. i know i shouldn't. now, i know i won't ever.

still, i can't believe i actually believed you.

of course you can always say, hey at least you got something.

and then you can proceed to tell me your sob story. your melodrama.

maybe i should cry for you?

but that's the way you are. that's why you are always stuck in the past.

and you can also say, i could have reminded you, or push you. ask for it.

intiative? that's kinda hard you know. so what if we took it? you dun even know what needs to be done yourself. and you blame us?

of course this is just a possible scenario. but you can't blame me for thinking too much.

isn't that what you always do?

attitude reflects leadership, ___.



tell you the truth, i am sick of wiping your ass for you.

you are like chelsea. chelsea with an a. i am not your greatest fan.

Saturday, August 05, 2006

precious

On the day I couldn’t see my heart, I felt insecure. The meaning of loving somebody, it’s something I decide myself. truth can be found in everything.

I promise you, I won’t wander off anymore. I’ll be strong...and prove myself to you. I won’t run away, I’ll turn around to face you, so I can see how you feel, to heart

I will believe, so the two of us can be together in love. In order for my wish to reach the sky I will look for you, and pray for the two of us. A pair of thoughts, now they can come together and form a whole. Your precious love

When pain or bitterness pulls us apart, we can hold each other. We’re no longer alone, because everything is answered by true love.

I will believe, so the two of us can be together in love. I’ll hold your hand forever, don’t let go, let’s make a promise, the two of us. A pair of thoughts, now they can come together and from a whole. Just the two of us

I believe that right now we can strengthen this young and complacent love. There can be truth. A new beginning. I want to be one with you.

I will believe that we can come together, right now, right here, and love each other. So in order to light your light fill me, I hug you tightly

I will believe, so the two of us can be together in love. In order for my wish to reach the sky, I will look for you, and pray for the two of us. A pair of thoughts, now they can come together and form a whole. Your precious love
total football is the epitome of football. it condemns formation to mere numbers.

but because it is the pinnacle, it is not easily achieved, hence the need for formations, for a system, for some discreet organisation of the game.

consider a team of people who seldom play and one solitary player who plays often. under such circumstances, that one player has to inject some form of organisation into the team. in other words, he has to guide the team along.

the only time when we can play without such interference is when the team has reached such a peak of understanding, of chemistry that they know instinctively how to move, where to move, when to move. it is not that there is no system, just that the system has become...internalised. such that it is no longer the thing you focus on, but rather, the individuals.

football is simple only at the highest level, when everyone has gained sufficient understanding of the game.

that is also why, a perfect team is not the team with perfect technique or whatsoever, but the team with the perfect chemistry. tactics can stop technique. but if u think about it, if you consider the entire game, maybe it isnt so. it depends on your definition of stop. if it hinges on only one encounter, then tactics can definitely stop technique. but technique only requires 1 chance. 1 moment of magic. it is all that it requires to defeat tactics. so in a way, technique can defeat tactics, but mostly tactics is the one way to stop technique. gifted players can be kept quiet for most of the game with tactics. of course if they produce that one moment of genius, that is another story. in any case, the one thing that can beat tactics is understanding. understanding comes from within. it is something special, very hard to be explained. tactics is explained. tactics cannot prepare for that unknown. to counter the unexpected, you are on your own. so in a way, understanding is like 9 moments of magic, compared to technique's 1. that is why understanding is what a great team is about.

and on where the best player should play. it is often argued that the best player should be played at the back, where he can control the game. true to a certain extent. especially when the playing area is bigger. but in small areas, and when the team has many defensive players, the best player must play upfront. otherwise, you are never going to score. the idea is to defend in numbers, in an unglamorous manner, and loft the ball up, hoping to get it to that player to do his magic. he may be surrounded, but you have to believe in him, in his ability to produce that one moment of brilliance to beat the opposition.

last wednesday, i came to this conclusion.
i suppose it is a kind of fate if you leave a place for a while, den you come back to it and see someone from the place leave the place.

maybe we will wonder with whom we will end up.

you can think of love as a massive game of musical chairs. all the chaos. so much so that you don't know, till the day you die, who was wif u at that last moment.

if love is a game, if you decide to play, then of course you must be prepared to lose.
but win or lose, you won't know till the very end.
and there is always two ways of looking at things. maybe more than two.

and back to that point about how the first sets the "ideal", maybe that's why some people will never forget their first love. and when that happens, they say the first love is the most pure and genuine, subsequent ones are replays. very true, if u go into the next relationship, looking for the shadow of your first love. at least that is how i think it would turn out.

how big is our heart, really? can it hold more than one person? but then again, so what if there is only space for one person? we can always let that person out right? let me let you go. or we can lock that person up and throw away the key. den it's eternal sorrow.

of course i would like to be sentimental, emotional, the heart. it's about the heart. but sometimes, it has to be about the head. that's the cruel fact. we have to force ourselves to detach ourselves and look at things mechanically, cold and calculated. ok, this is what happened. this is what i learnt. that kind of stuff. then our heart will recover, will recuperate, grow stronger.

sometimes, when the going gets tough, when you don't know what the hell is happening, throw everything you know out. because all these preconceptions are clouding your judgement. you keep thinking: this is how things should be. that makes it hard for yourselves. fluidity, flexibility. i cant emphasise enough.

but maybe the most important thing is to never siehst dein leben wie ein film. see ur life as a film. dun make yourself the hero of your own melodrama, thats yijun's words. still very true. cos the world may cry wif u for that 2 hrs, but after that, they go back to their lives, while you are still stuck dere, crying.

you know, there are two ways to protect yourself in football.

1, you don't play. but you hurt yourself, because you are always restraining yourself, stopping yourself from playing, though you want very much to play.

2, play with a nonchalant manner. fall, just pick yourself up. that kind of play. maybe even tripping someone in the process. u just have to endure the pain.

in any case, this season, expect a flurry of transfer activity.

on transfers, i am quite pissed that reyes is talking of leaving. i dun want him to leave, because to me he is a special player. but i tink our team is a little screwed up at the moment. so we have to see how things go. but reyes shouldnt leave. not many players can succeed in epl, because u need a certain kind of temperament. ronaldinho might not be able to survive in epl. but i always believe, even though he hasnt always shown it, that reyes has that kind of temperament. explosive.

like fernando torres. i would like torres to play for arsenal.

Europa

“Win it, and it’s 10 million euros.”

Those words repeated themselves in his head. “I need to form a team,” Jeffery Bridge decided.

He came to the Tuerkheim area, the Turkish quarter of town. He could hear a lot of noises. He glanced at his watch. Close to midnight. What could it be? He came closer to the source of the noises.

A group of young men was playing football by the empty road. He stopped by the railing to watch, interested. They seemed to be enjoying themselves, Bridge observed. He watched on. The ball bounced behind one of the youngster who had taken a step too early, or too far. But just when Bridge thought the attacking move was finished, that youngster stretched out his left leg and slammed the ball downwards. At the very next instant, he had somehow swung his body back in line with the ball, which had by then bounced up. A snap volley. The ball went straight between two cardboard boxes, presumably the goal. The opposing players raised their arms in mock despair, while that lad grinned and slapped the outstretched palms of his teammates. Someone said something. It was probably in Turkish. But Bridge knew very well that it signaled the end of the small game.

He also knew very well that he had found his first player.

The boys were getting ready to move. That lad put on his black leather jacket. Bridge went up to him.

“Good goal.”

The boy just looked at him, somewhat surprised.

“Do you have a moment?”

He nodded, and motioned for his friends to go on.

“Jeff Bridge.”

“Yusuf Korkmaz.” They shook hands.

“How long have you been in Germany?”

“I was born here.” Yusuf looked at Bridge strangely.

“You like football?”

Yusuf’s eyes glinted. “Very much.”

Bridge smiled. “Do you want to play for me? There is a tournament coming up. Five-a-side. Street. 10 million euros for the winning team.”

Yusuf’s eyes narrowed in suspicion.

“I am forming a team. I need you in my team.”

Yusuf was still hesitant.

Bridge gave him his name-card. “Call me when you have decided. We have about a month before the tournament starts.”
*
The next morning, Bridge was at a court near his house, watching some more youngsters play.

“That guy in white. He is good. You know him?” he asked the boy standing beside him.

“That?”

“Yeah.”

“Falchini.”

“Italian?”

“Yeah. His family came from Italy ten years ago. But there’s only his grandmother left now. Accident.”

“Oh.”

“He is a troublemaker.”

“What do you mean?”

“He gets into all sort of trouble with the school, with the law. He dropped out of school. Violence, I think. He was put in detention the other time round. He has a nasty reputation here.”

Suddenly, there were some shouting from the court. They turned to look. A fight had already begun. Falchini was in the thick of it. Bridge left, shaking his head. He wasn’t looking for a troublemaker.
*
He found himself next in a bakery. He bought some bread and stood by the glass window, eating. There was a young lad beside him.

“Nice weather,” Bridge said, trying to make conversation.

“Nice weather to play.”

“Play?”

“Football.”

Bridge was suddenly interested. “You like to play football?”

“Yeah. But I don’t think I am going to play from now on.”

“Why not?”

“I am out of the academy. They say they don’t have a place for me anymore.”

“Do you want to play for me?”

“You?”

“There’s a tournament coming up. Five-a-side. 10 million euros prize money. I am forming a team. Are you interested?”

“But you have never watched me play.”

“Look. Er, what’s your name?”

“Frank. Frank Lazymski.”

“Polish?”

“Yeah.”

“Ok. Look, Frank, I believe you are good enough, whatever they might say. You want to be like Podolski?”

“I am not a forward.”

“Ok, but we shall see how it goes. Here’s my contact. Just tell me when you want to join.”

“I want to play.”

“That’s good enough for me,” Bridge smiled. A reject could not be that bad.
*

There was a young man juggling the ball at the square. Bridge watched on. His technique was superb. His body movement was elegant. Fluid. It was like art. He looked like he could go on forever. But he stopped, trapping the ball neatly under his shoe, to applause from the onlookers. He took some photos with the people who had been under his spell. When they cleared at last, Bridge went up to the boy.

“Jeff Bridge. Wonderful ball control you have.”

“Corey Staelen. Thank you.”

“It is like art.”

Staelen laughed. “We try to do things beautifully. There is nothing better than to be acclaimed for your style.”

“That sounds familiar.”

“Cryuff said that.”

Bridge laughed. “You are Dutch?”

“Yeah.”

“Bergkamp’s my favourite player. I am an Arsenal fan.”

“Oh. Good attacking team. I like attacking football.”

“You want to play in a tournament? I am forming a team.”

Staelen was interested, and Bridge got his man.
*
Bridge chanced upon some lads having a kick-about. He joined in. At the end of it, he had found two more players. Best friends they were, Leo Warnecke and Marc Debuchy. French and German. Things were getting better and better.
*
“Your paella, sir,” the handsome waiter interrupted his thoughts. Bridge was now at a Spanish restaurant, looking at the Real Madrid memorabilia all over the restaurant.

“Thank you,” he said. “The owner must be a Real fan.”

“He is,” the waiter nodded, smiling.

“What about you? Do you watch football?”

“I am Barcelona through and through,” he said with pride.

Another waiter came up to them. It was around five, so the place was empty except for him. “Francisco was with the Barcelona youth team. They wanted to sign him, but he didn’t want to play professionally.”

“Why not?”

“I want to see the world,” Francisco shrugged and grinned at the same time. Bridge could tell this was a very confident young man. “That’s why I am here. Maybe a year on, I will be in France.”

Bridge laughed. “What about playing leisurely? I am forming a team. Would you be interested? We are going to take part in a competition. But it is not professional, so…”

Francisco Torres was the next person to join Bridge.
*
Bridge was back at the court a week later. He spoke to the boy whom he asked about Falchini that day.

“Where is the Italian boy today?”

“He hasn’t been playing. He comes sometimes, but he just sits and watches. His grandmother just passed away, so things are a little hard for him. Oh, there he is.”

Bridge went to sit beside him. The Italian glared at the intruder in his private space.

“Falchini? I am Jeff Bridge.”

Falchini ignored Bridge’s hand.

“I guess things aren’t going well for you…”

Falchini turned his head. “My life is screwed up.”

“And so, you are giving up on football? How much does football mean to you?”

“You don’t know anything.”

“Maybe I do. Listen, football is your only form of redemption now.”

Their eyes met. That was how Bridge convinced the Italian rebel Paolo Falchini to play football again. He was that last player, the player to complete his team. Yusuf Korkmaz had called him to signal his intention to participate.
*
Bridge had gathered his team at an empty courtyard. Bridge had met the lads separately, to assess them if he hadn’t already done so on the first meeting. But it was the first time the team met. They introduced each other. Leo Warnecke, Marc Debuchy, Corey Staelen, Yusuf Korkmaz, Francisco Torres, Paolo Falchini and Frank Lazymski.

Bridge was banking his hopes on them.

precious

this summer, the love song of the season has to be yuna ito's precious.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRadPGzzfUE

partly because the song itself is very nice, especially the lyrics, they subbed the mv, so it is very convenient. partly because it is umizaru.

ai katou got a certain kind of style, though she dun ahve supermodel looks. it is really not hard to see why she came in 5th for some kind of poll abt who japanese men want for their girlfriend.

aya ueto was first, den yuri ebihara was third. misaki itou was 6th, otsuka ai 7th, hasegawa kyoko 9th. tts the top 10.

the complete list is here, though you prob wun understand, since the names are given in jap.
many actresses and singers whom i haven heard abt for a while are on the list. while some of the more current ones even lag behind these. so i guess u can say they arent as fickle as i tink. and they do give careful thought before they make their choice.
http://www.ytv.co.jp/geikoi/ranking/ranking0619.html

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JOxYb1EXac8
the opening clip of boku dake no madonna~and i love her. a show from a while back, think 02 or 03. the song is southern all stars' sea of love, which is a very stylish summer song. the kind of song tt makes u want to sashay along the beach, feeling the soft sand tingle ur feet.
when i saw the second part of the clip back then, the part when hasegawa and takizawa walked in the rain, i knew immediately that that was the kind of feeling the song produced. the whole intro fitted the song very well, but this part was teh jewel in the crown.

what is the feeling like? the feeling is like when the ball comes to you at the perfect moment, the perfect pace, the perfect position, everything. everything clicks in place. perfect.

Friday, August 04, 2006

i just finished natsuo kirino's out, a book which i have always wanted to read. it was disturbing. it immediately reminded me of sidney sheldon's tell me your dreams, which i read like more than 5 years ago.

maybe it was because i was just an impressionable teenager then; but whatever the case, tell me your dreams set the benchmark with regards to the genre of crime fiction. i haven read such fiction in a while, but it was difficult to find another one which made me really sit and read through the entire book like tell me your dreams had done to me.

out and tell me your dreams are of course very different books. but the impressions both left on me were on that same level.

and sometimes you just wonder why is it that the "first" always seemed to have been the best.

like how the subsequent sheldon books i read hadnt had the same effect as tell me your dreams.

you can't really say that it is harder to "live up to expectations", because in this example, tell me ur dreams wasnt like his first book or something.

then maybe you can say in a way it is fate. beginner's luck. the very first book you pick up of his is that book, the one for you, as there would be otehrs for other people. maybe that is how it is.

or maybe the first will define the ideal. how things should be. which is not really very good, because it makes us have this fixed idea of how things should be. imagination should be boundless.

or maybe i am jsut talking crap.

but in anyway, coehlo's the alchemist is really very nice. it's my 3rd coehlo book, and it's just as impactful as the first, which was the devil and miss prym, and the second, which was by the river piedra i sat down and wept.

murakami's south of the border, west of the sun was great too. as had all of his books that i read so far.

4 books in a week. that kind of adrenaline, that kind of feeling in may is coming back. or was it april?

the valencia i don't know

what is the world coming to?

aimar to zaragoza, mista to athletico madrid. aurelio to liverpool. morientes in. del horno in. they want christiano ronaldo and simao sambrosa too.

i am quite pleased that del horno is with bus. and i wun mind simao sambrosa; he would solve our right flank problem.

but really, the biggest shock is aimar to zaragoza.

just because everyone has the problem doesn't mean there is no problem.